My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
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