gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
Randomize