Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
How I know that I'm single: when I get a save the date for a wedding & I read "& guest" my first thought was does my bottle of Jack Daniels count.
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
Randomize
