You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
