I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
Randomize
