Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Randomize