Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
Randomize
