Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
