I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
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