I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Randomize
