She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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