Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
Randomize