all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
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