Last night I had a dream we played Uno and had sex. You won at Uno, but you lost at sex.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
