last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
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