And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Randomize