His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
Randomize
