i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
Randomize
