Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
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