with your own penis?
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
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