So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
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