DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize
