I'd wear matching sweaters with you
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
Oh my god. Just had sex with this girl on the boardroom table at my work at midnight (win!) just realized I left the condom wrapper on the table (lose!)
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
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