I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
Randomize
