Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
She tied me up with her honor cords...
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
Randomize