im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
Randomize
