Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Randomize
