There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
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