If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
It's no shave November. This is our time.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
Randomize
