think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
