Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
