He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
