I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
Randomize
