Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
Someone shattered a urinal.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
Randomize
