New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Randomize