Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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