Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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