What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
I walked into a room this morning and someone asked how my back was because I apparently threw myself off the porch after attempting to set myself on fire. Who the fuck let drunk me play with fire?!
Better question: who the fuck planted a tree next to the porch?!
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
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