id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
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