Having your wife answer your cell was so lame. Maybe we can talk when you get your phone, your facebook account, and your balls back.
Did you just see the Batmobile???
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
