Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize
