You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
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