her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Randomize
