I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
Randomize
