There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
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