We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
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