So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
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