I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
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