addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
i dont even know how to be here
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Randomize
