You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
Even my vagina gasped.
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
Need ride home. Girls. Stolen keg. Rolling down streets. Horny girls. No condoms. Rescue needed. girls and beer in exchange for rescue and bacon?
I. Hate. You. Where are you, are said girls cute, and how did you know I bought bacon? And how does this always happen to you?
Smarter than the average bear
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
