just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
Randomize
